Face Off: Napoleon Makeup Lesson

“I feel pretty, oh so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and bright…” Those West Side Story writers were either super excited about singing, or they’d just had their makeup done by a Napoleon makeup artist. Because after my recent appointment to have my ‘face done’, I was singing this song all the way home.

It’s not often we mere (non-Kardashian) mortals get to have our makeup done by a true professional. One of those amazing creatures who knows the secret to that witchcraft they in the industry call “contouring”. Someone who knows how to apply eye shadow and blush so you don’t look like the lead singer of Twisted Sister circa 1988. And all for $99, which also includes $99 of product. Wait just a minute! I’m no astronaut or mathematician, but I’m pretty sure that means the makeup application is FOR FREE YOU GUYS!!


free stuff meme

Image: 98fm.com

And it’s not just sitting there in the fancy high chair having someone apply magical unicorn dust* to your cheekbones, they actually teach you how to do it yourself when you get back home with your magnificent haul of products.

I opted to get my makeup done for a big event – otherwise known as my first real grown up date after exiting a long-term relationship. For most other people this would be deemed a normal Saturday night – but when you have an 18-month-old baby and have lived permanently in yoga pants a top-knot for the last year, it’s a pretty special occasion. A REAL DATE WITH A REAL BOY! So after my very un-lady-like meltdown to my girlfriends that went something like this…

“…what am I going to wear? Nothing fits! My mascara has all dried out and my chin is covered in pimples. I will never be loved again!!! (blubber, blubber, blubber)…”

I decided to book myself in for this experience and get my face on. And you know what? I’ve still got it! Those Napoleon magicians made me feel like a model in that fancy chair, complimenting my skin and eyes and selected the most flattering palette to match my colouring and outfit for the night. I felt like a princess for the first time in a very long time.

And let’s just say the date was a success. (Wink wink, nudge nudge)**

So, whether you need a little confidence pick-me-up, or you’ve got a big event on the horizon that you want to look smokin’ hot for – this is the product for you. Hey, even if you just need to stock up on makeup supplies, this is the way to go because you can get a makeover for free! And there’s not much left in this life for free ladies.

*Not an actual product

**Results may vary